1. How is it possible that my not-quite-crawling baby can spot ONE TINY SPECK OF DIRT halfway across the house, and manage to scoot all the way there and have it in his mouth in 3.2 seconds?
2. Why is it so much more fun for two-year-olds to take pots and pans out of cupboards than it is to put them back in?
3. Why am I the worst mom ever because my eight-year-old can't watch television until his room is clean? (He's had the ability to earn tv rights for FOUR WEEKS, and yet he resists. Eventually the bedroom will be condemned by the health department, or maybe I'll find a family of raccoons nesting in the closet clutter.)
4. Why do I hate cleaning my kitchen, when I love having a clean kitchen?
5. What's wrong with wrinkly laundry?
6. Why am I writing blog posts when I should be studying?
7. Who the heck came up with the idea for Yo Gabba Gabba?
8. Why didn't I take a nap when I had a chance today?